The Four Kinds of Connections We Need

In the final episode of The Curiosity Shop, Brené Brown and Adam Grant draw on Adam’s new book, Vibe (out October 13), to explore how recognizing the differences between associates, allies, pals, and companions can help us better understand our connections. They unpack the pressure we put on relationships, the importance of being clear about what we want from them, and why a great interaction doesn’t always need to become an ongoing relationship. They also explore the idea of being on the same wavelength and the concept of “sonder,” the recognition that we can never fully know another person’s inner world. Along the way, Brené and Adam reflect on their own relationship, what they’ve learned from working together, and how their connection has evolved throughout The Curiosity Shop.



Vibe – Adam Grant, 2026, adamgrant.net

Tiny Experiments: How to Live Freely in a Goal-Obsessed World – Anne-Laure Le Cunff, 2025, Ness Labs

How the Enneagram System Works – The Enneagram Institute, enneagraminstitute.com

Give and Take – Adam Grant, 2013, adamgrant.net

Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community – Vivek Murthy, 2023, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services

Social Connection Linked to Improved Health and Reduced Risk of Early Death – World Health Organization, 2025, World Health Organization

US Trends in Social Isolation, Social Engagement, and Companionship—Nationally and by Age, Sex, Race/Ethnicity, Family Income, and Work Hours, 2003–2020 – Viji Diane Kannan, 2023, SSM – Population Health

Talk, Trust, and Trade-Offs: How and Why Teens Use AI Companions – Common Sense Media, 2025, Common Sense Media

What I Got Wrong About Connection – Adam Grant, 2026, Granted (Substack)

How I Overcame the Fear of Public Speaking – Adam Grant, 2014, Psychology Today

A Practical Guide to Building Taxonomies That Make Data Truly Useful to Your Organization – UserTesting, 2023, UserTesting Blog

The Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck, 1939, Penguin Random House

Friends – David Crane, 1994, NBC (IMDb)

Vibe Quiz – Adam Grant, adamgrant.net

DTR – Dictionary.com, 2018, Dictionary.com

Vulnerability Is the Birthplace of Innovation, Creativity and Change: Brené Brown at TED2012 – Helen Walters, 2012, TED Blog

Nicomachean Ethics, Book VIII – Aristotle, c. 350 BCE, The Internet Classics Archive (MIT)

Friendship – Bennett Helm, 2021, Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy

The Anatomy of Friendship – Robin Dunbar, 2018, Trends in Cognitive Sciences

Let's Rumble – Brené Brown, 2019, brenebrown.com

Similar Neural Responses Predict Friendship – Carolyn Parkinson, 2018, Nature Communications

Single-Serving Friends (Fight Club) – Uploader unknown, YouTube

Wharton Professor Adam Grant Knows How to Build Stronger Bonds at Work – Aman Kidwai, 2025, Newsweek

Mistakenly Seeking Solitude – Nicholas Epley, 2014, Journal of Experimental Psychology: General

Social Interactions and Well-Being: The Surprising Power of Weak Ties – Gillian Sandstrom, 2014, Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin

Learning to Talk to Strangers – Gillian Sandstrom, 2022, SPSP Character & Context blog

The Power of High-Quality Connections – Jane Dutton, 2003, Positive Organizational Scholarship (Berrett-Koehler)

Flow and Happiness – Joachim Krueger, 2015, Psychology Today

Basking in Reflected Glory: Three (Football) Field Studies – Robert Cialdini, 1976, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology

Brené and Adam on What They Will Never Agree On – Brené Brown, 2026, The Curiosity Shop (YoutTube)

Do Parasocial Relationships Fill a Loneliness Gap? – Heidi Godman, 2024, Harvard Health Publishing

Sonder – John Koenig, The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

Beautiful New Words to Describe Obscure Emotions – John Koenig, 2016, TEDxBerkeley

Atlas of the Heart – Brené Brown, 2021, brenebrown.com

Sonder Playlist - The Best of Sonder – Revive Music, YouTube

Awe, the Small Self, and Prosoc